A couple weeks ago we went camping for the first time as a family of four and for the season, now that it's starting to cool down. Actually it's still really hot, but not in the hundreds anymore! So, progress. We love love love camping. I didn't grow up camping, but have fallen in love with it since meeting Darren. There is nothing that gives you a sense of grounding and peace like being in nature, in my opinion. And seeing it through his eyes was absolute perfection. This was my first time going with him at an age where he understands and is excited about everything and it was enough to keep me coming back for more. That first morning us three enjoyed the sunrise and a couple hours together while Ivy slept, to explore with his "nock nocks" (binoculars) and play hide and seek in the trees. Like I knew I would, I left with the feeling that this is what we need to be doing and where we need to be. It just feels so right when we are taking in mother earth and all she has to offer. It's everything I want him to be experiencing.
Because we've moved around so much the past eight weeks, we ended up getting into some bad habits. We haven't been eating healthy, we've had way too much screen time and have all been pretty stressed and emotional. We were living to survive each day, doing the best with what we had but all of that is in the past. Now we are in our new place and I am so excited about moving forward. We start our days exercising and eating right and getting plenty of time outside into our routine. I feel so free again. And all this change has had a huge positive impact on him. He's been so emotional and grumpy and we've felt like a lot needed to change, but it wasn't until we moved that we were able to make those changes.
The first couple days he would ask to watch shows all day long, but after two days of telling him no more screen time, he stopped asking and now asks to read books instead, or play with his toys. It's amazing. Not only does this enrich his mind, but it gives us the opportunity to actually spend time together. I feel his connection to me strengthening because of these simple things we do together! Out of the blue he will come kiss me on the head or lips, something he's never done before and I can't help but feel it's because he feels happy. The other thing is food. He's been eating awful or not eating at all these past 7 weeks. But since we've been in our own space with our regular healthy food, he's eating. He asks for fresh vegetable juice every morning and will not let me skip a day. He's eating tons of fruit and drinking lots of smoothies and snacking on carrots. We really can't believe it.
Well actually, I can.
I firmly believe that our children are born with innate and pure goodness. They want to please us, their parents, they love everyone they meet and are eager to give countless smiles and affection throughout the day. And I don't think this suddenly goes away when they turn two. These past several weeks I have been so anxious, worried that this experience of being homeless would scar him and he'd "never eat anything healthy or want to play outside again!". So silly. Our kids want good things, we only need to give them the opportunities. We need to give them the tools to thrive. Im not saying that because tv doesn't work well for us it shouldn't work well for you. I am so unbelievably far from getting it all right all the time. We still have meltdowns and tantrums and really hards days. But I've noticed how much of what I am doing affects the level upon which those things happen. Somedays I am on my phone too much. Somedays it's easier to want to stay inside and just have him watch TV. I haven't been giving him my best so I am excited to turn a new leaf and start fresh. My only hope in sharing, is to be an encouragement for those of you in the same phase of life as us with little ones.
As I laid with him today for his nap I couldn't help but be impressed with the thought that it really is so simple, he just wants his mom. He wants his mom to be present. To love him by engaging in him and giving her best each day. So that's what I'll keep trying to do. Lot's of time outdoors, together, in the sunshine, with family and lot and lots of love.