I haven't really felt a need to leave Wes with anyone -except Darren- yet and when the time came I wanted it to be a natural progression, not something I was "supposed" to do. This first year with a baby is so eventful and also gone in a flash. It's not that there isn't anyone I trust him with, but I will only have my first baby once and I just don't want to miss any moments or memories. Darren and I see this as a season in our lives and know it will be someday be gone.
The first few months he was with us always, even up until we went to sleep. He slept on us a lot and we loved this time. Gradually as he got older he started sleeping on his own in the evenings so we could have some alone time. This allowed us to connect while he slept and a few times we have done date nights at home (which I actually love!). Currently we are still having a lot of sleepless nights, and have gotten to the place where I felt a night out alone was something we both needed.
Because we aren't able to get the rest we need, we have all been sick recently but are finally getting past it. Darren has been amazing, supportive, more than helpful, empathetic and understanding towards me and our Wesley. And not just recently, but always. I witnessed him holding Wesley's little sick body the other night and I thanked God for such a wonderful and selfless man. I'm crying now as I realize how blessed I really am!
Learning to balance it all has been tricky for us as we just want to give Wes everything we have. But I know there is also importance in reminding your spouse they matter, in whatever way that maybe. I don't think there is a right way to do this because every family is so different, but it is so important. We have had our times of losing our connection in the mundane, but we always come back willing to try.
I wanted to do something to show him that I notice his sacrifices and efforts as a husband and dad so I surprised him with a date as a Valentines Day gift. Our first date post baby! The best part is that he wasn't expecting me to leave Wes for a couple more months, making the surprise that much better. I wanted to show him that he is still my priority and so special to me.
We went to dinner and enjoyed amazing food and conversation. Once we were done we looked at each other and said "what do we do now?" haha! I sat at that table and enjoyed seeing my husband just as my husband. The man I fell so hard for almost four years ago. The man who has seen every unpleasant side of me, but still loves me endlessly. I feel like this night brought us closer than ever, on many levels. And that is what Wes deserves, parents who really truly care for each other.
I hope you all have a Happy Valentines Day and spend it with those you love!